We had to put my dog down today. Chip. He was a greyhound and 14 years old...He died right in my hands. It's really hard to believe that, ya know? Anyway...
He's not going anywhere in his life. I don't need that. I need someone who is going to push me towards my goals, not hold me back. I need someone who will encourage me to go that extra mile. He doens't do that. He doesn't have a plan. I don't have a plan but I want one and I want someone to help me with that. What the fuck, I have a plan. I know what I want. I want someone else who knows what they want so we can acheive our goals together. Together. What happened to independence. I used to be so independent like in High School then college hit and all of a sudden I needed people. I needed someone. But I don't. I want. I honestly just want my independence back. I wanna fucking transfer outta this state. I wanna just fucking get away. That's all I want, God! Why can't I just get out?! Why can't the ONE person I want have a plan and do something with his life? Okay, so I'm bitching about little things but ya know, I have a right to. It's my blog. Not yours. Get over it and keep reading. I want Chip back. I'm a needy person? A little tonight. My mom and sister already put up the Christmas decorations. I think it's to get their mind off Chip. I miss Chip. I want to transfer. Yes, I'm running away from my problems but that's worked for me in the past and frankly, it will work for me now. Fuck reasoning.
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